Fundamentals
It’s recommended to read this aloud before any Heart Circle
- This is a safe space to speak and share whatever you wish. Sharing trigger warnings, before you speak, is encouraged.
- A talisman will be passed around the circle – only the individual holding the talisman should be speaking.
- When speaking, use “I” statements, and talk loudly.
- When not speaking: this is a space for active listening without judgment.
- You are welcome to take breaks, move your body, put in headphones for personal music, or (quietly) use fidget toys. If you want to take a break from the Heart Circle – at any time, for any reason – you’re invited to give yourself space (please depart quietly).
- What’s spoken here, stays here.
- If you want to talk to someone about their Heart Circle share, seek consent to discuss the topic with them.
- When the talisman gets back to the facilitator they’ll announce the time, and we’ll take a short break before returning for another round.
- We use a stopwatch to keep track of time. The facilitator will let speakers know when 5 minutes has passed, then every 3 minutes after that.
- To respect everyone’s attention spans, and to ensure we all have a chance to speak, please focus your share to around 5 minutes. If you go over, the facilitator may ask you to continue your share next round.
- For the first round we invite you to share your name, pronoun, and a check-in.
Additional Guidance
- We love to say, “I invite y’all to take a breath with me.”
- We may have soft music or natural sounds playing to help those who audio-stim.
- If you would like silence when you’re speaking, please ask to have the music paused.
- Please mute your phones.
- Please: no phone use in Heart Circle.
- If you leave Heart Circle, please depart quietly (ideally between speakers).
- A porous Heart Circle container (one that allows folks to arrive & depart as needed) is recommended – and is especially valuable during Gatherette & Gathering events.
The Role of the Facilitator
The facilitator supports the community in collectively holding the container, helping the space remain focused, supportive, and safe for everyone.
- Group Awareness: keep a general awareness of everyone present in the room, ensuring you’re both holding space for the collective energy, while also focusing on the current speaker.
- Holding Time: if a speaker goes over time, you should gently interrupt them, have them pause their share, and encourage the speaker to continue sharing the next time the talisman returns to them. Please use your phone’s stopwatch feature to keep track of the elapsed time for each speaker, rather than using a timer.
- Example: “hey friend, sorry to interrupt, but it’s been 8 minutes and we need to move on. Can you pause your share, and continue it next round?”
- Guiding the Group: to help ground and recenter the group, you should encourage everyone to take some collective breaths whenever they feel called.
- Maintaining Focus: if a speaker drifts from the guidelines, you should gently interrupt them, and ask that they return to the guidelines that help hold the circle’s collective container.
- Example: “hey friend, just want to remind you that it’s important to use I statements when speaking.”
- Managing the Space: you help steward an environment of focus and calm for the Heart Circle. This may include asking others to remain quiet, encouraging people to speak up, or adjusting the room environment (lighting, music, temperature).
- Supporting the Container: by modeling these boundaries, and reminding others of their value to the collective container, you help everyone feel held and respected throughout the circle.
- Trust Your Intuition: trust your intuition; allowing yourself to follow, or ignore, these guidelines as your heart and the energy of the room guides you.